Search
 
Write
 
Forums
 
Login
"Let there arise out of you a band of people inviting to all that is good enjoining what is right and forbidding what is wrong; they are the ones to attain felicity".
(surah Al-Imran,ayat-104)
Image Not found for user
User Name: DrUzmaSyed
Full Name: druzmasyed@gmail.com
User since: 15/Feb/2012
No Of voices: 28
 
 Views: 1406   
 Replies: 0   
 Share with Friend  
 Post Comment  

The Devil's Temptation

Dr. Uzma Syed

You are completely wrong for me. I know I need some time to figure out where we are going but I am so involved in where we are that I cannot think clear headedly. My mind is nagging me endlessly as I fall head over heels in love with you. I refuse to listen to the roaring thunder of my heartbeat and thus there is very little that I can hear in this deafening sound. I am more lost than I have ever been before. Everything is in a mist and I know very soon this fog will clear up and I will be left stranded in the aftermath of a terrible storm. Nothing worthwhile will survive this romance and yet I stubbornly resist the call of sanity. You act like a spoilt schoolboy most of the time, you forget promises you make, you say hurtful things and you treat me with the least respect and consideration possible. You only reach out when you need me in some way and I seethe with anger at your cavalier attitude towards me. Every time I manage to convince myself that you are not the one for me, you do something amazingly endearing and I forget the solemn pledge I took weeks to make. My head has known for ages that you will break my heart ruthlessly and walk away unscathed, but my heart is so helpless in its adoration of you. I cannot sort out this mess without a clear head and right now my faculties are overwhelmed with this oblivion called love. Reasoning is an impossible venture in my current state of mind.
I make myself another steaming cup of yellow label tea. I find myself lured back to the refrigerator where half a Molten Chocolate Lava cake beckons me. Someone has quite accurately named it the Devil’s temptation. I am always on a strict diet of oats and barley cereals, high fiber and high proteins. And yet as soon as this little dessert is brought home all my wisdom and caution tiptoes to the fire exit. I succumb to this uncontrollable desire sliver by sliver until the entire confection is voraciously devoured. And then I am back to my sensible diet until the chocolate fairy revisits. As I lick off the creamy crumbs from my fingers and fight the urge to cut another tiny little piece, a wonderful revelation dawns upon me. You are my devil’s temptation. I know for a fact that you are not good for me in any way and yet I indulge myself in your world whenever I can. I love the flavor and the aroma of your presence and even though it promises nothing but misery, I pamper my senses to this delicacy. I enjoy every nanosecond of every moment I spend with you and when you leave I crave incessantly for the familiar feeling. It is an addiction that I cannot comprehend but all my will power fails when you step into my world.
I have finally managed to record one of our conversations so that I can analyze this infatuation in a more sober state of mind. Whenever we are near, I am in a state of acute intoxication and nothing goes past the blurred rose tinted view of a heart in love. And after listening to the hour long dialogues repeatedly, I am convinced that I do not know the person I become when I am with you. The eloquence with which my heart utters feelings and desires around you is utterly amazing. You have the tact of knowing just the right things to say and even though you oscillate between being a gentle, loving soul and a relentless fighter I find it easy to adapt to the variation. It is surprising how absolutely different we are in some ways and yet we can share so many commonalities. I guess compatibility is how synchronized the differences between two people are. And of course the raging rapids of life between two people are bridged by love, compassion, mutual respect and kindness. There is no remedy for the lack of either.
Pacing in the second storey terrace of my home, I am smiling thoughtlessly. I have just finished the last morsel of the chocolate cake and the fitness mania is back. For days I had been crying for no apparent reason when I thought I had lost you. I was drenched in melancholy and desperation. And one call from you has made me so light and blissful. I am surprised at how my feelings change tides at your beck and call. I know I am not a priority in your life, but my heart ranks you at the top. I have yet to find a name for our relationship. We are not merely friends. Walking briskly I wonder if I can find a good substitute for you when I lose you in the crowd. I know that no one will be able to take your place. The liberties I allow you are denied to everyone else. You hurt my pride and I let you walk all over me. You care little and show no sign of affection while I shower my endearments on you. You make me cry and never make it up to me and I still find it easy to forgive you. I know these are the signs of love and one sided love can be a cruel torment. But I also understand that I need to love you to be able to breathe and live. It is beyond my control to stop loving you. And so I smile as I fail to resist my devil’s temptation and let my heart touch the clouds.

 No replies/comments found for this voice 
Please send your suggestion/submission to webmaster@makePakistanBetter.com
Long Live Islam and Pakistan
Site is best viewed at 1280*800 resolution